Public Service Announcement #2
For Public Service Announcement #1 "Wear Clean Underwear", click here.
Just a reminder that the following types of insurance are available:
Zombie Insurance
Available through The Zombie Apocalypse Insurance Company (ZAICO). Provides comprehensive insurance for a class 3 zombie outbreak. Includes arms and ammunition restocking, home repairs, incineration of dead un-dead (most homeowner associations frown on rotting corpses lying in the yard for longer than 24 hours) and re-location of you and your family to a zombie-free zone (if there is one).
Post Rapture Pet Insurance
Eternal Earth-Bound Pets provides certified atheists (guaranteed to remain on earth after the Rapture) to look after any pets left behind.
Alien Abduction Insurance
Provided by the UFO Abduction Insurance Company. New! Frequent flier endorsement. "Don't leave Earth without it."
Immaculate Conception Insurance
Available through Goodfellow Rebecca Ingrams Pearson (GRIP). I'll let you figure that one out on your own.
Because sometimes, we all need a little extra piece of mind - or maybe, just a mind. This has been a public service announcement, brought to you by Flash Fiction. (@ficflash)
Some people will do anything in pursuit of the almighty dollar!
ReplyDeleteThe Rapture one is funny!
ReplyDeleteI have heard of the Post Rapture Pet Insurance. Hey, if people feel better about the welfare of their pets, so be it. They are already being bamboozled, in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteI'm gonna look into that Zombie Insurance, though. That could really happen.
this made me laugh... good one...
ReplyDeleteJJRod'z
So, instead of a gecko, ZAICO's spokesperson is a . . . =]
ReplyDeleteI don't know if I want atheists hanging around cats. They're used to being treated like gods, you know.
ReplyDeleteGRIP...that's a clever one.
ReplyDeleteI had not thought about rapture and pets... I'd better get one of those policies! The homeowners association and rotting corpses bit is funny too... well, not funny exactly, kind of disgusting if you thing about it, funny in a disgusting way.
ReplyDeleteMy wife keeps bugging me, saying: "Honey, I just don't think we're ready for a Class 3 zombie outbreak. Class 1, fer sure. Class 2, it's a definite maybe. But Class 3? All those wicked wicked people walking around like it was the end of the world or something. Why we'd be like frogs to slaughter, fer sure!"
ReplyDeleteAnd I sez: "Where on Gawd's Green Earth are we gonna find that kinda protection? We ain't got no unlimited budget!"
Now I know. :D Happy Tuesday!
I LOVE the one about the pets LOL!
ReplyDeleteThat's some crazy stuff! I'm paying for too much insurance as it is. Guess I'll just take my chances on having to deal with any of these events.
ReplyDeleteLee
Tossing It Out
Nice blog you have! :D
ReplyDeletethx for info
ReplyDeleteread this all
follow
LOL.
ReplyDeleteThought this hilarious.
ReplyDeleteYvonne.
Very funny, and, I have to admit, the audio option just adds to the hilarity - ZAMbie insurance indeed.
ReplyDelete